Monday, May 6, 2013

I'm back for good, I promise..

Holy crap. Its been almost 2 years... I'm sorry. I have been through hell and back. At my work I have had 2 robbery's only a month apart, both of which I was the center of. The 1st one didn't threaten me but the 2nd one held me up with a knife to my throat... Was just lovely... sarcasm... Today, I feel like crap. I took a Zumba class tonight and then a work out class right after. Now I hurt. Thanks to those fucking robberies I've put on weight. I am 153 pounds and I am not happy about it. It's all stress, but it makes me mad. I makes me cry at night. It makes me not want my boyfriend to see me naked, even though I know he thinks I'm beautiful. I'm I a bad person? Why are all the bad things happening to me? Why did I get robbed at work, not once, but twice? Is this a sign that my near death experience was suppose to actually kill me and my time is soon? I was at work (my new job [I'm a server at a family restaurant]) last night, and low an behold I realize, after I finally see his face after he finished his food, that I was serving the 2ed guy who robbed me, and 2 of his family members. What did I do? I pretended like nothing was wrong and as if I didn't know who he was... he recognized me, I'm sure he did before I recognized him, he was hiding his face the whole time I was serving them. I have a restraining order against him... why didn't I kick him out? ughhh :( Why is life such a fucking bitch? So in order to take it off my mind I worked out tonight like no other... now I'm paying the price, I'm sore. I'm doing the same tomorrow too, 225 squats, country workout class, then to finish with hot yoga. To all my followers, I hope you'er still with me. xxx stay strong xxx -Sandyy <3

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